Why Titoki has small boobs...
Ed note:
I wrote the following funny 'Boobs Watch' post in my old blog two years ago. It kind of explains why my boobs are small. *wink wink* Now I'm going to present it to you HERE in its original flavour. And before you proceed, let me forewarn you this, READ AT YOUR OWN RISKSss & ENJOY!!!
Why people keep gawking at my chest area? Click Here.
Is it because I'm wearing a GREENISH shirt? So green that no one else but ME dare to wear it?
Is it because of the pimple on my neck? So big until you are able to see it from three feet away?
Is it because of the diamonds necklace that I'm wearing? So shiny until it blinds you?
Hmmm... Or maybe you are actually looking down and smirking at my insignificantly small boobs?!
*SLAP YOUR FOREHEAD for leering and staring at my boobs so boldly and rudely*
My boobs are small is not by choice or by genes. Well, it is because... this is what my mom told me... grandma squeezed out my 'milk' when I was a baby. *GASP*
Mom said, "You cried so loudly when your little breasts were squeezed hard by grandma for the milk to squirt out. It must have hurt very badly my dear." *DOUBLE GASPS*
"OUCH~ OUCH~ OUCH~ Child Abuse!!!" I screamed.
Just in case if you are my cousin and if you are reading this, mom told me that every female member in the family was also treated with the same kind of 'inhumane punishment'. No one escaped! She is not kidding me and I am not kidding you either!
"But wait, baby got milk one meh?!" I asked her.
Mom replied, "Oh yes, only a few drops. And you need to squeeze it very hard for it to squirt out."
"But WHY? Why are you guys so cruel to a baby?!" I protested.
Mom continued, "Well, the older generation believes that once the 'milk' is squeezed 'clean' from the baby girl's breasts, she will have small boobs when she grows up. Small boobs have lower risk of breast cancer and small boobs do not attract any unwanted males' attention."
I was totally dumbstruck by her answer. It was like, "Huh?!! What kind of theory is that?!!"
So I said to her, "Mom, NO MALES' ATTENTION?!! You want me to live like a nun for the rest of my life ah?!" *SOB*
She answered, "Why not?"
Bitch.
Then I asked her, "Since my breasts are already 'damaged' by you guys at an early age, and my boobs are definitely small, but why then some people will still not hesitate to blatantly stare at my pathetically insignificant boobs?!"
She replied coolly, "Oh, maybe because we didn't squeeze you hard enough then, do you want me to do it again? I mean NOW?"
"No thanks!" I covered up my breasts (with both hands) and ran up to my room.
I wrote the following funny 'Boobs Watch' post in my old blog two years ago. It kind of explains why my boobs are small. *wink wink* Now I'm going to present it to you HERE in its original flavour. And before you proceed, let me forewarn you this, READ AT YOUR OWN RISKSss & ENJOY!!!
Why people keep gawking at my chest area? Click Here.
Is it because I'm wearing a GREENISH shirt? So green that no one else but ME dare to wear it?
Is it because of the pimple on my neck? So big until you are able to see it from three feet away?
Is it because of the diamonds necklace that I'm wearing? So shiny until it blinds you?
Hmmm... Or maybe you are actually looking down and smirking at my insignificantly small boobs?!
*SLAP YOUR FOREHEAD for leering and staring at my boobs so boldly and rudely*
My boobs are small is not by choice or by genes. Well, it is because... this is what my mom told me... grandma squeezed out my 'milk' when I was a baby. *GASP*
Mom said, "You cried so loudly when your little breasts were squeezed hard by grandma for the milk to squirt out. It must have hurt very badly my dear." *DOUBLE GASPS*
"OUCH~ OUCH~ OUCH~ Child Abuse!!!" I screamed.
Just in case if you are my cousin and if you are reading this, mom told me that every female member in the family was also treated with the same kind of 'inhumane punishment'. No one escaped! She is not kidding me and I am not kidding you either!
"But wait, baby got milk one meh?!" I asked her.
Mom replied, "Oh yes, only a few drops. And you need to squeeze it very hard for it to squirt out."
"But WHY? Why are you guys so cruel to a baby?!" I protested.
Mom continued, "Well, the older generation believes that once the 'milk' is squeezed 'clean' from the baby girl's breasts, she will have small boobs when she grows up. Small boobs have lower risk of breast cancer and small boobs do not attract any unwanted males' attention."
I was totally dumbstruck by her answer. It was like, "Huh?!! What kind of theory is that?!!"
So I said to her, "Mom, NO MALES' ATTENTION?!! You want me to live like a nun for the rest of my life ah?!" *SOB*
She answered, "Why not?"
Bitch.
Then I asked her, "Since my breasts are already 'damaged' by you guys at an early age, and my boobs are definitely small, but why then some people will still not hesitate to blatantly stare at my pathetically insignificant boobs?!"
She replied coolly, "Oh, maybe because we didn't squeeze you hard enough then, do you want me to do it again? I mean NOW?"
"No thanks!" I covered up my breasts (with both hands) and ran up to my room.
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